An Unfortunate day in the life of Alexander
by Shuichi Saito
Summary: Meow seemed to glare at Alec, his eye's wide, he swatted again at the sleeve, and Alec threw the sweater away, instead going to grab for the disaster that was Chairman Meow. Malec. Pure Crack.


It hurt like hell, he couldn't even describe how painful it was, and from the worried looks on the mundies faces, they clearly thought he looked like hell.

He gingerly touched the bridge of his nose while jogging back, and a new sensation of pain passed through his face, but, being a shawdowhunter, he keps his poker face in check, trying not to notice the fact that the front of his faded gray sweater was sticky with semi dried blood.

"_Shit! Alec" Jace exclaimed, he yanked back his fist and leapt to his parabati's side, where he was withering on the floor._

"_I...I'm fine" The words came out warped, gurgling and almost uniteligiable__, the black haired boy pushed himself into a sitting position and pulled his hand away from his face, wincing. A steady stream of blood dribbled from his broken nose, dripping off his chin and soaking his sweater._

"_Oh…I'm sorry man" Jace said, he too looked shocked at what he'd done, he thought Alec was going to cleverly block his blow – however, from the pain ridden look on Alec's face, and the small droplets of blood on the training room floor – he hadn't._

"_I'm fine" Alec grunted again, he touched his nose. Yep, defiantly broken. Jace reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out his stele, pointing the tip steadily against the marble skin, he drew a healing rune on his 'brothers' forehead. The familiar warmth spread through his face, and he could feel the broken nose slowly mend, rejoining, before the pain numbed, making it feel like he'd held ice against his face for hours._

"_Well, your survived" Jace said, grinning and eyeing Alec's face, it looked as good as new "But the numbing might ware off, your face will be all tingly for a few days" His eyes brightened "And it looks like Magnus will have an excuse to buy you some new clothes"_

_Alec looked down his front and groaned in annoyance._

Alec used the key to open the main door, before jogging up the creaking stairs two at a time. He unlocked the next door to take him into the bright apartment. It hadn't changed a bit since the first time he'd saw it, though he was sure that his retinas were slowly burning due to the amount of neon. He looked at the clock and smiled, 3:30. He still had a whole 30 minutes before Magnus was due back from seeing a client. He's run from the institute all the way to Magnus's…uh…their apartment in order to get back before Magnus. He'd got the whole plan formed out in his mind.

1)Get back home  
2) Wash sweater before Magnus gets home  
3) If step two was successful, there will be no need for Magnus to worry about his broken nose (Poor Alec didn't want to make his warlock any more stressed than he already was) and for him to drag him into…Hot Topic…

Alec shuddered at the though, practically running into the en-suite and yanking his sweater off, scaring Chairman Meow who was sleeping on the toilet seat, for some strange reason.

"Sorry Meow" Alec said, he put the hot tap on and filled the sink with soap. In all honesty, it would have been easier to use the washing machine, but that would take too long. And he would be forced to wear one of Magnus's T-Shirt (Seeing as the Warlock threw every one of his sweaters in the bin, apart from the one he was wearing – deeming them 'Spawn of the devil')

He dabbed at the dried blood, which was coming easily out the sweater, he wanted to give a cry of relief, if not for Chairman Meow.

Damn Cat…

Meow swatted at the stray thread hanging from the sleeve of Alec's Sweater, Alec growled.

"Stop it!" He hissed, yanking the sweater away "Or I'll kick you outside"

Meow seemed to glare at Alec, his eye's wide, he swatted again at the sleeve, and Alec threw the sweater away, instead going to grab for the disaster that was Chairman Meow in order to lock him into the bedroom or something.

The sound of a splatter filled the room, and Alec paused, turning around slowly, biting his lip.

The contents of what was goodness-knows-what was spilt all over the floor. The clear bottle that once held the liquid was cracked and split open – and to make matters worse. Chairman Meow leapt into the strange puddle, padding around, before licking his fur, smearing the stuff. Everywhere.

"I'm going to kill you!" Alec snapped, he shoved the now clean sweater in the corner of the room and pulling the plug so the pink water could rinse away – leaving behind no evidence except for a sopping wet sweater and a slimy cat.

He ran from the bathroom, wincing when he saw the paw prints all over the carpet, he saw the little rodent sized cat curled up the sofa, and Alec looked in horror at the clock. 4:00 – meaning that at any time, Magnus could come home and see what the shadowhunter had done to his beloved apartment and the minute cat…

Alec rugby tackled the cat, holding his slimy body as tightly as he could against his bare chest to prevent him from getting away, and sprinted towards the kitchen sink; he dunked the cat in the said sink and turned on the tap – careful to make sure it wasn't too hot.

The Cat screeched in protest, but Alec held on tightly, rubbing the liquid off his fur…Alec's eyes widened…Chairmen Meow now had a gigantic bright purple streak down his back, and four, bright purple paws.

Hairdye…He sighed; he should have known Magnus would put something like that in such a place.

Chairman gave another meow, and Alec's shoulders fell. So much for a simple evening: He wanted to come home and snuggle with his beloved Warlock on the sofa, and maybe watch a few prerecorded episodes of Project Runway.

He pulled Meow from the purple water and gave him a quick dry using the tea towel, setting him back down on the floor. Chairman Meow hissed and ran off in a blur of white and purple towards his food bowl.

Alec nibbled at his lower lip as he heard the door before opened, and watched as his tired, but very sparkly boyfriend stepped inside.

"Vampires!" Magnus groaned "Ungreatful bastards. Always wanting something for nothing…" Magnus trailed off, and stared first at Chairman Meow. Who looked like a small purple and white zebra, then at the numerous purple paw shaped splodges all over the carpet, and then up at Alec.

Oh god.

Magnus giggled, and then the giggles turned into full blown laughter "W…wow! I must say – purple works extremely well with your skin tone darling. But I think a few streaks in your hair would have been much nicer than having a purple chest, don't you think"

Alec glared at Magnus, who continued to grin.

"Can you magic it off for me?" He asked sweetly, Magnus's grin widened "Why on earth would I do that sweetie. Finally you're wearing something other than black"

Alec looked down at himself "How long will it last?"

Magnus cocked his hip out in a very gay pose, and pressed his hand to his mouth in thought – though Alec thought it was mainly to hide the smile on his face.

"Only three weeks – Two weeks if you scrub yourself raw?"

"THREE WEEKS!"

**An idea I got after I managed to get purple hair dye on my hands, and now I've got a purple hand print on my arm. Very annoying – but oh well. STORY INSPIRATION!**

Now my lovelies!  
Please drop a review – it helps feed Chairman Meow (And encourages me to write more)


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